Advanced Fiction Writing Assignment 10

Assignment 10

Author’s Note:  The lesson covering assignment 10 was all about dialogue. We were instructed to write a scene or story featuring dialogue between two characters. I decided to parody typical small-town Midwestern talk around the dinner table at a family meal to create what, to those who are outsiders to the dynamics of what (or in this case, who) is being talked about, is probably the equivalent to trying to listen to the Abbot and Costello “Who’s on First?” sketch and figure out what’s going on. Admittedly, the dialogue section could’ve been a bit longer, but this was just supposed to be an initial draft.

Grade Received:  A

Midwestern Monologue

Tyler pulled his red Audi sports car into the long, winding driveway and up to the simple two-story white farmhouse. He got out of the smart little vehicle, proceeded around to the passenger side, opened the door, and helped his girlfriend Leeanna out.

This was a big night for Tyler—finally meeting the steady girlfriend’s parents. He was a bit unprepared as to what to expect from this. He was from an urban West Coast family—two college-educated, professional, dyed-in-the-wool liberal parents and two cookie-cutter style brothers—and now he was meeting Leeanna’s parents, who were rural Midwesterners:  salt-of-the-earth, God, guns, and country-type folks. He remembered with chagrin his parents’ disappointment when he told them what kind of people his girlfriend’s parents were:  first, his mother’s sad dismissiveness when she was told that Leeanna’s mother was a homemaker, then his father’s incredulous scoff at the fact that Leeanna’s father had been a die-hard Republican since Barry Goldwater had burst onto the scene. Clearly there were going to be delicate issues to work around should he ever decide to marry Leeanna and merge the two families. Tyler exhaled loudly and silently reminded himself to take things one day at a time as he closed the car door gingerly.

Leeanna gave him a reassuring smile.

“Don’t worry, babe. They’ll like you.”

“I hope so,” he said sheepishly as they walked towards the front door.

Leeanna’s father answered the door at Tyler’s knock. Tyler and Leeanna made their way into the farmhouse, and after the customary exchange of strained, polite greetings between The Beau and The Girlfriend’s Parents (during which Tyler nearly had all of the bones in his hand crushed by Leeanna’s father’s hearty grip) and the customary wait before the meal while the women did some last-minute putzing around in the kitchen, they sat down to eat following a short recitation of a generic grace.

Following the customary interrogation of Tyler as to his line of work and the general facts about his family, Leeanna’s parents fell into their habit of talking amongst themselves, a habit they acquired when Leeanna, their youngest, had moved out of the family homestead.

“Went into town today,” said Leeanna’s father.

“Oh really dear? Anything new?” said Leeanna’s mother.

“Yep. Saw Ginny Tolley’s son.”

“Bobby? The one who went to jail?”

“Naw. The other one.”

“Oh, Michael? He’s a good kid. What’s he up to now?”

“He’s a manager at Farm ‘N’ Feed. Gonna marry the Robertson girl next month.”

“Which one, Sarah or Diana?”

“Diana, I think. The one with the red hair. He showed me her picture.”

“Oh, that would be Marcy. She’s not a Robertson. At least not by blood. I think Joe adopted her when he got remarried.”

“He got remarried? When?”

“Oh, about ten years ago. To Phil Smith’s granddaughter.”

“Roberta or Jeannette?”

“Jeannette.”

“What was her maiden name, anyway?”

“Tolley. But she’s not related to Ginny. At least I don’t think so.”

“Oh.”

The old married couple fell into a short, comfortable silence. Tyler had been trying to follow along, but not knowing any of the aforementioned people, he became confused early on, so he looked down at his plate and picked awkwardly at his food.

Leeanna’s parents soon resumed their conversation, this time with her mother in the lead.

“You’ll never guess who I saw at the quilting bee the other day.”

“Who?”

“Miriam! Bill’s ex-wife!”

“How’s she doing?”

“Oh, she looks good. Lost some weight.”

“Good for her.”

And thus they continued for another good hour. By the time Leeanna gently interrupted her parents and suggested that she and Tyler could handle the kitchen clean up, Tyler’s head ached with confusion.

Once they were in the relative acoustic safety of the kitchen, Tyler spoke to Leeanna.

“How do you keep all of that straight?”

“You don’t,” she said matter-of-factly. “You just keep your head down and eat what’s on your plate.”

“Um, O. K. Is that a normal conversation around your family?”

“Yes. Now you see why I moved to Seattle.”